Let's Brush The Dust Off

ACS_0169.jpg

LET’S BRUSH THE DUST OFF!

Hey, how have you been? That’s awesome. Oh, I’ve been doing okay. Still getting back into a good rhythm since the last time I posted on this space (which was just about two months ago!!) I spent some time doing a lot of self-reflection, getting a bit of my personal life in order, and recently got back from a week long vacation at Disney World —I’ll be talking about the trip in a later post.

So, what’s going to happen with this space? Well, your girl is gonna attempt to give it one last good go. I’ve got a personal goal in mind for the remainder of the year regarding this blog (I won’t share it until I do my year in review so let’s see if I keep it up until then eh?) Biggest thing I have decided to do is focus this blog a bit more. Previously, I was just trying to do ALL THE THINGS but I’ve realized that while I have a lot of things that I am interested in that doesn’t mean I’m passionate enough to write about them.

With that said, I’ll be focusing this blog on one of my major loves: Disney! You’re probably thinking “but what about your art, crafts, books, etc?! Don’t you love talking about them?!” and you will be pleasantly surprised to learn that none of that changes! I have a ton of books on my TBR list that are related to Disney’s take on fairy tales, lots of movies I want to talk about under the Disney brand, I’ve started some brainstorming on new art projects, and even some cross stitching stuff. Now this doesn’t mean I won’t talk about some of my other geeky loves (like Harry Potter, Pokemon, or movies that really excite me), I just realized after getting back from Disney World that I tried to fit myself into a ton of different buckets but when I sat down for a moment in my office I looked around and realized that everything on my walls was Disney related (Funkos, Minnie Ears, and even art) so making it one of the primary focuses of the blog just made so much sense.

I also had a realization that every time I would try to push to do more things outside of my day job I would start panicking as if all of my time HAD to be spent on my day job. That is such a toxic mindset to have and after spending so much time at Disney World and just completely tuning out of work I can finally say that I’ve given myself a little break through. There are so many women I look up to who tackle lots of personal projects while also kicking butt at their day jobs. There is zero reason why I can’t do the same.

So here’s to new beginnings and to bringing just a little bit of magic to your day.

♡ Mana

I Hit Burnout...

milada-vigerova-7276-unsplash.jpg

I HIT BURNOUT…

I had known that I was basically running on fumes the last couple years as I pushed myself to keep going above and beyond on everything that I was doing. Of course when you do that it means that you’re going to start failing at most, if not all, those things when you aren’t giving yourself time to rest.

So a couple weeks ago (funny enough, a few days after my last blog post went up) I had a breakdown. I got unbearably sad at the thought of wanting to draw after I was inspired by a book I had just finished moments earlier. It’s only been two weeks since that incident and I am still recovering.

Burnout is just a never ending cycle, a simple vacation isn’t going to fix it. You have to be willing to make a fundamental lifestyle change and find that work-life balance that works for you. I am lucky in that I have an understanding partner and I work at a company that supports you taking care of yourself.

I have realized that I put things aside that I enjoy to focus solely on supporting the companies I work for instead of realizing that I can support my day job while still making time for supporting my own personal projects. They don’t have to be mutually exclusive. I also stopped investing in my friendships with people I care about because I let myself believe that they “understand the hustle” but I should’ve realized I was playing into a thought process that didn’t align with my personal values.

  • I stopped creating art.

  • I stopped working on craft projects.

  • I stopped streaming.

  • I stopped making videos.

  • I stopped blogging.

  • I stopped spending time with friends.

  • I stopped playing video games.

  • I stopped reading books.

I realized all of this after taking some time to just mellow out and listen to my inner voice. In that moment of self-reflection I had the “ah-ha” moment that a lot of points where I was feeling a lot of the effects of burnout I was also changing my hair away from purple. I love my hair being purple, its “my” color, and I now know that when I suddenly want to completely change it up that there is something off so I will stop to ask myself “what’s wrong?” —because boy did I get lucky that the black hair dye I used in my hair recently didn’t stick and I was able to get my hair back to its full purple glory.

So where am I headed from this point? Well, I’ve been trying to take it day by day. Focusing on trying to find the simple joys in drawing, reading, playing games, and reaching out to friends. It’s been a slow process and things definitely aren’t going to change overnight. But I know that I have people to lean on during the rough times and that I don’t have to give up my career to do the personal projects that I want to do. Everything can coincide together as long as I remember that I don’t have to take on all the things all the time and to take steps in the size that work for me — not the size that works for everyone else.

Be prepared for world domination in 2019 ;)

♡ Mana

Oh gawrsh it's been a while

Hey blog, how have you been? I have been a bit busy...or rather that is the excuse I would normally give. The truth is that I had let some folks bully me into hiding and being scared to share my thoughts on this space or to be creative in general. After taking a short break to go to my happy place (Disneyland) and a short staycation I took time to think and realized that it's time for me to get back into doing the things that I love. 

ManaCastle.jpg

Since my last blog (which was back in April) I have gone to Playlist Live in Orlando, EA Play in LA, VidCon in Anaheim, and hosted a two-day event at work. I have also gone to Disneyland twice in the span of  4 months and made a short trip to Disney World for a day while I was in Orlando. I'll be doing a separate blog about those trips over the next week or so. 

I have also completed a few more outlines from my Pokemon cross stitch project though I, admittedly, need to pick up the pace as I am lagging behind significantly. I am hoping to finish the outlines of the first 151 (plus Alola varients) before the end of the year so I can go all in on the colors in the new year. 

Another thing that happened: I reached "Affiliate" status on Twitch. I haven't streamed since I got affiliate because I have no idea what I want my emotes to be and so now my brain is thinking about the "long game" when it comes to this stuff. I don't plan on changing emotes completely as I'd rather just update the look of an emote than remove one outright. I've just never given it much thought as to what I would theme my channel around...probably Disney and Karaoke >.> WHO KNOWS. 

Looking forward to getting back into blogging, streaming, making more YT videos, and just overall being creative!

♡ Mana

My Spring Vacation Haul!

The boo and I went on vacation down to LA to visit Universal with some friends (my first time to the one in Hollywood and his last visit was when he was 9 years old!) and then we travelled over to Anaheim to spend the remaining days in the happiest place on earth: Disneyland. 

I, of course, spent way too much money on some goodies but this time around I tried to be practical with my spending and taking the time to walk around and think about the things I was buying before going up to the register. Let's go over what I purchased (without adding in the cost because it would just make me cry.)

UNIVERSAL: 

From left to right:

  • Eeveelution Purse (Purchased at Citywalk)

  • Set of 4 Pokemon Pins

  • Harry Potter Hogwarts Houses Keychain

  • Death Eater Patch

  • 2 Pack of Deathly Hallows mini notebooks

  • Minions Week View Calendar

  • Luna Lovegood Interactive Wand (her second wand)

  • Gryffindor Notebook with metal crest

  • Gryffindor Bookmark

  • Gryffindor Red Leather Notebook

  • Hogwarts Houses Mini Pins

  • Minions Mousepad To-do List

  • Minions To-do List Notebook

DISNEY PARKS:

From left to right:

  • Aladdin VHS Notebook

  • Hidden Mickeys Location Book

  • Mickey Mouse Rainbow and Black mini backpack with fuzzy Mickey zipper charm

  • Mickey Icecream Pin

  • Mickey Oh Boy Pin

  • Disney Parks Trashcan Highlighter Set

  • New Mickey Mouse Cartoon Pen set

  • Metal 3-D Puzzle

    • Haunted Mansion (Gift for a friend)

    • Cinderella Castle

    • Sleeping Beauty Castle

    • Disney Parks Monorail

    • Space Mountain

    • Mickey's Fun Wheel

There were a few items that weren't pictured that I purchased, will mix both parks for this one since it's not a lot. 

  • Gryffindor Zip Up Hoodie

  • Gray Disneyland Hoodie

  • Black Disneyland Varsity Sweater

  • Lion King VHS Notebook

  • Several new postcard art prints (will show my collection in a future post)

Overall my trip down to SoCal was a huge success and I had a lot of fun meeting new friends, seeing old ones, and just being surrounded by my happy place. Remember to always believe in magic and take the time to have fun!

♡ Mana

I'm Tired Of...

  • The excuses I've let myself get in the habit of using far too often.

  • Putting all of my heart and passion into something that I didn't create or that I don't own.

  • Wasting my days away with browsing on the internet instead of creating something.

  • Getting jealous of others success simply because I'm too afraid to give it a go on my own.

  • Not taking better care of myself.

  • Letting negativity cloud my thoughts.

This is just a sample of some of the things I'm tired of. This came about as I was thinking about the fact that I'll be 31 this year and I don't feel like I have a lot to show for it. I also have so many ideas of things I want to do and accomplish but I just constantly give excuses. I see friends and peers I look up to accomplishing so much with a full plate of their own and I hit a tipping point.

Do I want my personal legacy to be "She was full of ideas but never took the initiative to do anything with them" or do I want it to be "She lived her life to the fullest and pursued her passions."

Now pursuing passions doesn't mean that you're all in or nothing at all. I know several people who manage their day jobs while also managing their personal projects on the side. Would I like my passions to be my full time gig? Of course, who wouldn't? But right now I want them to be something where I can escape from the everyday things that I do, to give myself time to not wallow on things that I just cannot control, and instead focus on what I CAN control and pour my heart into that. 

I'm taking steps to do just that but I felt that I just needed to get that out of my system as a way to motivate myself to DO the things I keep saying I want to do but never actually pursue it. 

I'm going to quit living in the village of "What Ifs" and got out and explore the land of "Unlimited Possibilities." I hope that you do the same for yourself too.

♡ Mana